By Suzanne Beverly Dayton- Guest Author
Right now mindset is everything.
As I sit at home trying to work, develop a new routine for my children, and keep the household chores under control, I find myself struggling with negative thoughts. You too, huh?
Nobody loves being on a video conference call and having your child screaming right next to you. And you rarely hear people say, “Oh I am loving all of this time to sit at home, day in and day out.”
I usually encounter this mindset trouble when people go on vacation. When asked how the trip was they jump straight to the long lines at the airport, service snafus at the hotel, or a perceived missed opportunity while on their trip.
But I also know people who almost always have a great flight, no matter what. I’ve talked to people whose trips got rained out, or who missed connecting flights, or who got lost, or who even had a wallet stolen — and when I ask them how their trip was, they smile and say, “It was great!” and proceed to tell me the full exciting tale.
So what’s the difference? I’ll tell you: they’ve let go of the Perfectionist Mindset and adopted the Adventure Mindset.
The difference between these two paradigms changes everything.
The Perfectionist sets unrealistically high expectations for themselves, others, and situations — and when things don’t go well, they often fall into self-blame or blaming others. They focus on what isn’t working and is often impatient and critical.
The Adventurer makes a plan and is prepared, but is willing to roll with what comes along that might not fit with “The Plan.” They see what’s going well and what there is to be grateful for and quickly offer appreciation, flexibility, and help in tough situations.
As author and coach Naomi Teeter points out, the Adventurer knows how to ask “quality questions” when faced with a challenge, like:
What’s the best thing that could happen from this?
Hasn’t everything worked out just fine in the past? Aren’t I OK?
What if I chose to be happy and carefree about this instead?
What is this teaching me?
How can I use this experience to support others?
How could I turn this into a great story?
What can I do differently next time so that this doesn’t happen?
If I’m honest with myself, I know that when I am having those negative thoughts it is because I am in the Perfectionist Mindset, especially right now. But I also know that at any moment, I can choose something different. I can always choose an attitude of adventure and you can too!
Meet Suzanne Beverly Dayton
Suzanne is a travel agent and Europe Specialist that helps smart, successful, busy women plan their ideal European family vacations. Download your Free Printable, Worry Free Checklist for Traveling with Kids.
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